the night is still young. i can do yoga and use my oil pastels. i can cut another fruit. i can write in my journal. i can make a poem. i can invite the figure outside my window in
Have you watched The Office anytime lately? I can’t bring myself to watch it. I follow meme pages that post about it so it kind of feels like I’m watching it but I know I’m not. I can’t, even though I want to. I kind of wanted to text you and see if you thought The Good Place was worth the watch. I don’t even think I want to watch it. I think I just want to talk to you. I know that’s kind of pathetic, given everything that’s happened. I can’t eat the treats you gave me for Christmas. Because if I do, then they’ll be gone. I can’t even use the mug. I left everything the way you left it.
I went to the teahouse for the first time today in a fairly long time. I was really nervous but I didn’t really have anywhere else to go. I’m sat eating my food and drinking my drink and remembering last time you and I were in there. And it sucked. All over again. 
I’m committed to understanding myself. I’m committed to creating better relationships. I’m committed to being a better and healthier me. I’m committed to learning.
As long as you know your intentions are pure, never stress yourself about anything or anyone. You have to trust that you will always end up being where you’re meant to be and that it’s never your loss respectfully.
